12.1.06

Go read Bob!

One of my favourite US-American bloggers, Bob Harris, is travelling through Autralia at the moment and you should really check his travel diaries here. I disagree with a lot of the fulsome praise he heaps on this country but then again, I'm not from the US. I don't mean to sound narky but if you're of Bob's (and my) ilk, pretty much anything outside of the US would seem progressive by comparison. I guess. Anyhoo, if you have a few minutes, go pay a visit and read, I swear it'll be worth your while. You'll find pearls like this:
It's [the Australian habit of shortening words] a cheerful habit, frankly, the sort of thing that could make even tragic news seem perfectly fine. I wouldn't be surprised to hear some young "fresher" home from "uni" who had forgotten to wear "screenie" on his "skinno" might breeze into the kitchen and lightly tell his mum that he now has a large "melanomazza" which has gone all "maliggie," with smiles all around.

This would sink in somewhat. Then he and his mother would play rugby in the hallway while eating meat pies for a while. (I bet that happens a lot here.)

Then, after mum had won 25-24 in a hard-fought match, he would break the sad news that his "cance-o" would mean he would need "surgers" down at the "hospie" and that the "dokkos" were only giving him eight "weekies" to "liverazza."

After which, he would turn out to be fine. No worries. He'd be back on his feet, playing meat-pie hallway rugby with mummer again in no time.

Because it's like that down here.
Trust me: the man can write. Ah, if I had but the words...